You are currently browsing the monthly archive for January 2011.

Life with three kids is full of noise. And so is my head. Sometimes it’s because of the noise around me, and sometimes it’s my own fault. Sometimes I’m constantly on the computer, looking for something, anything, to keep my brain busy.

And usually, my brain is happier when it’s busy. I don’t like having to sit and wait and do nothing. I want to at least have something to read.

But sometimes, I recognize that what I really need is some quiet, and I’m seeing that right now.

I have a lot to do tomorrow. I don’t have to work, so I’m planning to take care of multiple errands and household tasks. But maybe I can carve out a time and place for quiet; if not tomorrow, then maybe some evening soon.

One place I like for quiet is The Grotto, also known as The National Sanctuary of Our Sorrowful Mother. It’s a Catholic sanctuary on Rocky Butte in Portland, Oregon, with 62 acres of gardens and chapels. It’s peaceful and beautiful, with indoor and outdoor spaces, and it’s much less expensive than the typical spiritual retreat (free to visit the lower level; $4.00 to ride the elevator to the upper level).

Just thinking about it makes me smile.

Today was a difficult day. Did I get through it? Yes. Did I use coping strategies to get through it? Yes. I took some deep breaths, took myself offline for a little while to eliminate stress, and went for a two-mile walk. I also reached out to a higher power. Did this connection help me get through today? YES.

Part of the difficulty today was an encounter on Twitter with a couple of people who have a problem with me believing in this higher power. In the past, I’ve been more likely to get upset about encounters with religious fundamentalists who think that everyone MUST believe as they do, and practice religion as they do. But today it was atheists — who also think that everyone should believe as they do. And today, they were insisting that Christianity is evil, and encourages people to kill, and what kind of God allows children to be killed or molested, anyway?

And it got to the point where it was simply not a healthy conversation any more.

For now, I’ve unfollowed them on Twitter. That just means they won’t show up in my timeline while I’m on Twitter. I haven’t blocked them from my life. I’ve actually known one of them for several years, and I don’t want to do that. But I can’t take a daily barrage of what I’m starting to feel is hate speech.

Other than that — I’m hoping to move forward with a loving attitude, and without entering into potentially hurtful conversations.